Life with Sicko

Friday, Josh and I stayed home because he had a high fever and, “it hurts to swallow, mom.”

After a little give and take between the Tylenol and fever, I finally packed Josh up and took him in to the doctor. The entire ride there, he was beside himself with worry. “Will they stick that thing in my throat that makes me choke? I don’t want to go to the doctor. They’ll choke me and give me shots.”

*sigh*

We got in there and the doctor looks in his throat, then in his ears. He lifted up his shirt and looked at his tummy and said, “I don’t have to swab. It’s definitely strep and scarlet fever.”

Scarlet fever? WTF? Is this the 1920’s? Wasn’t that all the rage back then? I don’t know. I had no idea what scarlet fever was. Didn’t people die from that? Or go blind? Grow hair on their palms?

“Some seasons, for reasons unaccountable, scarlet fever appears in a malignant
form. Such an epidemic occurred in the winter of 1879 in the little village of
Harrison, Ohio, nearly every case resulting fatally, and this was my first
introduction to scarlet fever. So intense was it, and so fatal in its results,
that I have ever had a dread of this disease, and when scarlet fever appears,
there rises before me a picture of that epidemic of 1879.”

SEE!

The doctor must have read my face, and said, “It’s just a rash that accompanies strep throat sometimes.” *whew*

Later, when I called my mom to fill her in, she wasn’t aware of scarlet fever even still being around, or anything about it.

“How do they treat scarlet fever?” she asked.

“Oh, it’s pretty easy. We just have to watch ‘Gone With the Wind’ over and over until Josh is no longer attracted to Vivien Leigh.”

Seriously though, he gave Josh an Rx for Augmentin.

Ever since, Josh has been off of the hook. Running, talking, not listening, throwing things, breaking toys, defiant – a monster. When you ask him what’s going on, the boy starts to cry. We’re talking real tears, not the big fake crocodile tears that come out of one eye at a time. No, these are a steady stream of genuine confusion.

I called the pharmacy last night, and they said that agitation, hyper motor activity and mood swings can be side effects of Augmentin in children.

I called the doctor this morning and told him to take my kid off of it and call in something else. Back to Omnicef, which we’ve had 85,000 times with each ear infection, so I know he tolerates it well.

I think I may have preferred swine flu.

I miss this

It dawned on me that I haven't shared any of my poetry on here for a long time.

I will do so today. This goes W-A-Y back to when Jenny O'Rourke and I used to spend our days holed up at each other's houses talking about whatever our pre-teen minds could grasp right at that exact moment.

When we weren't running through the farmer's field, getting humped by greyhound dogs or running to catch the bus and crashing through the ice on the mini-pond, effectively missing th bus, we were together. We said and did things that normal pre-teen kids do. Well, mostly pre-teen boys.

We were total tom-boys, neither of us at home in a dress or comfortable with makeup. Give us a tree, a lake or a farmer's field, and we were good to go.

One day, as we sat in the PIG fort (an old knotted tree in the farmer's field), it was discovered that the cows must've been in that field over night. How did we discover this? Why, the giant clumps of cow shit that had amassed on the bottom of my shoe.

"I hate that shit!" Jenny said. And in a moment, we were both giggly because while she said "that shit", she simply meant when stuff like that happens, not the shit, per se.

Later that night, I wrote a poem, inspired by our time that afternoon. And I share it with you now.


Poop!

We all hate poop on our shoe
I hate poop, I'm sure you do!

It comes out your butthole, soft and wet
The more you eat, the harder it will get

Constipation, what a bitch!
Makes your crotch and asshole itch!

Diarrhea! Not again!
It drips in your toilet, like ink from a pen.

Whether it's runny or whether it's dry
You don't want to get poop in your eye.

Poop!


I shared that poem with Jenny the next day and we laughed something fierce. Like two boys having discovered their first porno magazine, we memorized that sucker and said it in unison every time one of us needed a smile.

Our favorite line was the constipation one. We'd say it with such point and purpose.

I miss being a kid. I miss Jenny. I miss it all. I never thought I would.



"You're Gonna Miss This"

She was staring out that window, of that SUV
Complaining, saying, "I can't wait to turn 18"
She said, "I'll make my own money, and I'll make my own rules."
Mamma put the car in park out there in front of the school
Then she kissed her head and said, "I was just like you."


You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These Are Some Good Times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this


Before she knows it she's a brand new bride
In a one-bedroom apartment, and her daddy stops by
He tells her, "it's a nice place"
She says, "It'll do for now"
Starts talking about babies and buying a house

Daddy shakes his head and says, "Baby, just slow down

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These Are Some Good Times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
She keeps apologizin'
He says They don't bother me.
I've got 2 babies of my own.
One's 36, one's 23.
Huh, it's hard to believe, but ...

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These Are Some Good Times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this